Once upon a time

Once upon a time I lived in Queens, in an apartment that was hot in the winter and very very hot in the summer. We had the occasional cockroach. Fewer than in some apartments and more than in others. One night before going to bed, I saw a fairly spectacularly large roach on the wall of my room. It was the size of a cell phone, and I told my roommate that Gregor Samsa was hanging out in my room. I didn't want to smoosh it because the clean up factor would have been ugly. The roach spray wasn't around. So, I stood on my bed, hosing the bug on the wall with extra strength hold hairspray.

The bug fell to the ground with a wet plop, I walked away to wait for my sheets to dry.

Hours later, I went to bed, no clothes on as it was a million degrees in the apartment. At some point in the middle of the night, I rolled over and

::CRUNCH::

there was no blissful moment of ignorance. Immediately, I knew that my nemesis returned while I was sleeping. While I was shrieking and trying to get bug goo off of me, I realized that there was only 1 buggy leg on the bed.

My roommate came running in, armed with a baseball bat, and in time to watch me do the naked creeped out buggy dance.

She grabbed some paper towels, removed the corpse from my back and did away with the body.

Just a moment ago I saw a roach that was even larger than the one from back in New York. Again, no toxic chemicals around, other than some 409.

Sigh. Roach traps tomorrow.